Being a Working Mom

Yesterday, I was off work because I had several appointments in Conway that I scheduled on the same day. Clint's aunt kept Harper, but I did get to see her throughout the day quite a bit in between all of it. I REALLY enjoyed that and thought of how great it would be to have the opportunity to be a stay at home mom. I know that it wouldn't be all sunshine and roses and it would be really hard and trying on your nerves at times because taking care of kids isn't easy by any means! So, don't think I'm saying that it would be a much easier job than working outside the home! However, it would be nice to clean the house, do the laundry, grocery shop, run errands and cook dinner every (well, almost every!) night during the week instead of having to do all of these things on the weekends when all I want to do is relax, spend time with my family and do fun stuff.

I didn't think much of it throughout my pregnancy, but as soon as I was nearing going back to work last Fall, the guilt set in. Should I quit work and stay home with her? Am I a bad mom because I'm going back to work?

As most of you know, I did go back to work and have been back for about a year now. I still feel guilt several times a week over this, but I know that it is the best thing for our family right now. I could quit- we've certainly talked about it and Clint would be very supportive of it. We could sell our house, buy a smaller house, curtail our spending on non-essential "extras"; Clint could pick up some side jobs (he's very handy), but I really do enjoy my job, what I do, my coworkers and having my own responsibilities outside of the house that I am solely in charge of. I love our house, our neighborhood and being able to buy things that we might not necessarily just absolutely NEED. I also don't want Clint to have to work any more than he already does. I think an advantage to his job as a firefighter is the schedule that he has and being able to have his down time.

We stick to a strict budget in our household, but it would be crazy strict if I didn't work too! The only thing I absolutely HATE about my job is the commute. On average, I'm on the road almost 2 hours every weekday. I leave the house around 6:30 am and get home between 5:45-6:00 pm. On weekday nights, I really only get to spend about 2 hours with Harper after I get home.

We are extremely blessed to have Harper be at home all the time. Clint's aunt keeps her two days a week, Clint keeps her two days and my mom keeps her on Fridays. I think this makes me feel better because I know that she is being cared for by family (and her dad!), so I know she's comfortable and gets lots of attention. I am jealous that Clint gets to be with her so much during the week while I'm at work, but I'm so glad that she gets to spend lots of time with her dad! Also, it's a huge plus that Clint's aunt is a retired Kindergarten teacher, so Harper should be just as prepared for school as kids who go to daycare/Preschool. We have been doing some research and will probably put her in a Mother's Day Out program within the next year or two, just so she can socialize and be around other kids/adults.

So with all that being said, I don't think there is ever a perfect solution or answer to this dilemma that I feel every family faces who has kids. I think all options are great- working parents, stay at home parents, daycare, home care- it all depends on what works best for you and your family. Each parent wants the best for their children and makes the best decisions for their family.

I think the perfect scenario is having a job where you work about 3 days a week- too bad those are few and far between! :)